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Thursday (May 23, 2013) Eddie Money Doug secretly takes money from the "emergency fund jar" without Carrie's knowledge and bets it on a race. When he and Deacon win $5,000, Doug realizes he can't let know Carrie he won big or she'll realize he stole the money after she said he couldn't use it.
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Friday (May 24, 2013) Two Thirty When Doug has a bad toothache, he finds out that Carrie used to have a crush on his dentist, Dr. Farber. After Dr. Farber finds out that Carrie, who used to baby-sit for his kids, was obsessed with him as a teen, the now divorced dentist starts talking to Doug about what could have been.
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Saturday (May 25, 2013) Window Pained Mike and Debi, a bright young couple, move in next door to Doug and Carrie. The Heffernans don't make the greatest first impression as an argument they're having can be heard throughout the neighborhood.
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Sunday (May 26, 2013) Arthur, Spooner Carrie has been put in charge of overseeing a group of people who will be organizing and distributing legal documents for one of her firm's big cases. The catch is that her team will have to work the night shift, and they're not the sharpest tools in the shed. Doug is disappointed by her new appointment because this means that they won't be spending any time together, but then decides to use her time away as an opportunity to do whatever he wants - eat in bed, not brush his teeth before he goes to sleep, etc. Unfortunately, he starts to get a little lonely but soon discovers that Arthur makes a suitable companion to keep him company.
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Monday (May 27, 2013) Kirbed Enthusiasm Deacon has asked Doug to help him coach Kirby's pee-wee football team. In order to motivate the team, Doug tells the kids about the semi-professional team that he used to play with, the Nassau Rebels, and how he stopped playing with them once he got married. Kirby is disinterested in pee-wee football and leaves the field, only to have Doug and Deacon follow him to the car. Kirby makes Doug agree that he doesn't have to play pee-wee football unless Doug goes back to the rebels. Doug's new training regimen entails a healthy diet, and a strict exercise schedule implemented by Danny. Carrie is reluctant to let Doug participate in the tryouts for the rebels until she sees how sexy he becomes when getting back into shape. Unfortunately, the good times don�t last long for Doug because during Rebel tryouts he finds out how out of shape he still is!
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Tuesday (May 28, 2013) Holy Mackerel Doug and Carrie run into Father McAndrew at the fish market. They exchange pleasantries and as they are parting ways, Fr. McAndrew tells them that he would love to see them in church sometime. Unsure of how to decline politely, the Heffernans instead agree to attend Sunday's services.
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Wednesday (May 29, 2013) Jung Frankenstein After seeing Doug eat a hearty breakfast of pancakes and sausage, Carrie advises him to eat a light lunch since they'll be going to a play with some work friends of hers. Not only does Doug ignore her advice, he participates in an egg roll eating competition during lunchtime. By the time the play comes around, Doug has such an upset stomach that he can't stop belching. Carrie is infuriated and sends her husband home early only to find him stuffing his face with Yodel chocolate cakes when she arrives. Carrie convinces Doug to go see a therapist who will help him overcome his poor eating habits and lose weight. Doug’s therapist, Dr. Wagner, gives him some great tips on watching his food intake, and Carrie is happily surprised. Soon she starts giving her own suggestions on some of the "problems" the doctor can help Doug with . . . like watching too much television, being more spontaneous, tips on being a better lover, etc. It's not until Deacon gets in on the game and adds some issues of his own to Doug's "therapy list" that the truth gets out.
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